Who needs a broom?
You know you need to get out more when you find yourself in your truck, alone, and the kids' CD is still playing, and you know every word, and you're singing along, and it takes several miles before you realize what you're doing. Then you quickly turn the radio on to big-people music, and hope that nobody you knew saw you driving and singing to the Veggie Tales or Backyardigans (which, I must say, has some pretty groovin tunes). Not that this has happened to me.
I tortured myself today and took all 3 kids to the grocery store. I had avoided the place for almost 3 weeks, and we were officially out of dinner ingredients. Not to mention that I needed my sugar-free fudgesicles because I can't survive without them. Our grocery store (the only one in town) has those truck-carts. The front is a pick-up truck that kidlets can sit in and "drive", and the bed of the pick-up truck is the grocery cart. I usually avoid these like the plague because (a) they're a pain to steer, and (b) I spend the entire trip yelling at my children to get back in the truck, sit down, stop hitting each other, stop ripping tags off of the shelves, etc. But....today the prospect of having them in the little truck with the baby secured to the seat part of the grocery cart sounded halfway appealing. I had to figure out a fast plan of action, though, to keep them in the truck. I wound up bribing them, which is every preschool mother's best weapon. I told them that if they stayed in the truck, they could pick out any cereal they wanted at the end of the trip. We only have things like Rice Krispies/plain cheerios/Frosted Mini Wheats at our house, so the temptation for Boo to pick out the coveted sugar cereal that she so badly wanted was enough to keep her hiney glued to the truck. For the first several minutes, anyways. Then she tried to ride with her upper torso out the window of the truck, waving at passers-by. "But I'm still sitting!" she whined. I don't think so.
They layed on the squeaky horns over and over and over and over and over again, and wailed, "Emergency! Emergency! Out of our ways!" to everyone in the aisles. I've given up being embarrassed by this type of thing. The only thing that bugs me is when people glare at me...because you know they're thinking one of two things: (a) "What kind of an idiot has that many kids that close together? Haven't you ever heard of birth control? She probably had the first one at 15 and couldn't stop and she's just a little hussy!" or (b) "Doesn't she have *any* control over them? Look at how unruly they are! Poor children are going to grow up to be the bane of society!" To these people I respectfully say, "Bite me."
(Sorry, Mom.)
For the most part, we made it through the grocery store without a hitch. This would've been a truly miraculous event if only I had remembered to buy meat for our dinners. Sort of an important igredient, ya know? I had already unloaded half the cart onto the conveyer belt when I realized that I'd neglected the meat section. We did, however, have one box of Cookie Crisp and one box of generic Cinnamon Toast Crunch (Bubby doens't know "generic" yet). They begged me to let them have some before nap time, after nap time, for dinner, after dinner...and I'm sure I will get summoned to one of their bedrooms soon because they need cereal.
The other higlight of my day? The baby ate neon pink play-do. I have considered attaching Swiffer cloths to her belly since she does such a fantastic job of eating cheerios and other miscellaneous dropped crumbs from the floor...why not have her remove hair and dust as well? Today the big kids had played with play-do, apparently dropped a chunk that hadn't been picked up, and my human dust buster found it. Boo was screaming hysterically from the kitchen (really hysterically). I think she thought that the baby was in grave danger, but I suppose that's normal considering the baby's teeth, gums, and tongue were neon pink.
So, back to my question: Who needs a broom? I've got the baby. : )
I tortured myself today and took all 3 kids to the grocery store. I had avoided the place for almost 3 weeks, and we were officially out of dinner ingredients. Not to mention that I needed my sugar-free fudgesicles because I can't survive without them. Our grocery store (the only one in town) has those truck-carts. The front is a pick-up truck that kidlets can sit in and "drive", and the bed of the pick-up truck is the grocery cart. I usually avoid these like the plague because (a) they're a pain to steer, and (b) I spend the entire trip yelling at my children to get back in the truck, sit down, stop hitting each other, stop ripping tags off of the shelves, etc. But....today the prospect of having them in the little truck with the baby secured to the seat part of the grocery cart sounded halfway appealing. I had to figure out a fast plan of action, though, to keep them in the truck. I wound up bribing them, which is every preschool mother's best weapon. I told them that if they stayed in the truck, they could pick out any cereal they wanted at the end of the trip. We only have things like Rice Krispies/plain cheerios/Frosted Mini Wheats at our house, so the temptation for Boo to pick out the coveted sugar cereal that she so badly wanted was enough to keep her hiney glued to the truck. For the first several minutes, anyways. Then she tried to ride with her upper torso out the window of the truck, waving at passers-by. "But I'm still sitting!" she whined. I don't think so.
They layed on the squeaky horns over and over and over and over and over again, and wailed, "Emergency! Emergency! Out of our ways!" to everyone in the aisles. I've given up being embarrassed by this type of thing. The only thing that bugs me is when people glare at me...because you know they're thinking one of two things: (a) "What kind of an idiot has that many kids that close together? Haven't you ever heard of birth control? She probably had the first one at 15 and couldn't stop and she's just a little hussy!" or (b) "Doesn't she have *any* control over them? Look at how unruly they are! Poor children are going to grow up to be the bane of society!" To these people I respectfully say, "Bite me."
(Sorry, Mom.)
For the most part, we made it through the grocery store without a hitch. This would've been a truly miraculous event if only I had remembered to buy meat for our dinners. Sort of an important igredient, ya know? I had already unloaded half the cart onto the conveyer belt when I realized that I'd neglected the meat section. We did, however, have one box of Cookie Crisp and one box of generic Cinnamon Toast Crunch (Bubby doens't know "generic" yet). They begged me to let them have some before nap time, after nap time, for dinner, after dinner...and I'm sure I will get summoned to one of their bedrooms soon because they need cereal.
The other higlight of my day? The baby ate neon pink play-do. I have considered attaching Swiffer cloths to her belly since she does such a fantastic job of eating cheerios and other miscellaneous dropped crumbs from the floor...why not have her remove hair and dust as well? Today the big kids had played with play-do, apparently dropped a chunk that hadn't been picked up, and my human dust buster found it. Boo was screaming hysterically from the kitchen (really hysterically). I think she thought that the baby was in grave danger, but I suppose that's normal considering the baby's teeth, gums, and tongue were neon pink.
So, back to my question: Who needs a broom? I've got the baby. : )
posted by Beth @ 9:39 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home